But what couples often fail to realise is the importance of after sex conversations that can bind them together even after the act is over. It’s important for couples to relax after an exhaustive performance and nothing can be better than to converse with each other.
Dr. Amit Aggarwal, a Mumbai-based sexologist elucidates, “After sex, couples can lay down in front of each other and indulge in some canoodling. As for conversational topics, they can discuss how good they felt during sex, their most intimate feelings, their sexual desires and their displeasure towards certain gestures by their partners. Basically, the focus of the discussion should be on the things they love most about each other.”
Conversing about one's bedroom performance, sexual desires, sharing feedback or expressing love, here’s a lowdown on the topics that make great after sex discussions.
Discussing bedroom performance : It’s indeed a wise move to tell your partner about what you liked and disliked about a particular sexual session. Exchanging feedback about your sexual performance will not only make you feel at ease, but will also help you work on the weaker areas where you may be lacking.
Expert tip : Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex expert suggests, “It’s a healthy practice to discuss your performance once you’re done with the act, but do not over analyse the sexual act too much. Also, if you felt your partner lacked somewhere, device a way out to tell them patiently, but never compare their performance with anyone else's or else it will do more harm than good to your relationship.”
Planning another sex quickie : As the sexual mood continues to be in full swing, nothing can be better than planning out another intimate session. Talking about yet another round of a sex will not only ignite your passion, but will also bring you closer.
Expert tip : Dr. Aggarwal advices, “It’s a great idea to plan another round of sex and if you talk about it openly, it can guarantee you ultimate gratification. During such conversations, make it a point to highlight the things that you liked the most in the previous session. And also mention about the acts you didn’t enjoy, so that your partner knows what to avoid in the next round. Take advantage of this planning by looking out for innovative ways of intimacy that you can experiment with in round two.”
Expressing sexual fantasies : After a steamy romp, almost all your sexual desires would have been fulfilled by your partner. So go ahead and utilise those intimate moments to express more about your sex fantasies. It’s very likely that your partner, who is still sailing in that sexual mood, would listen to your fancies attentively.
Expert tip : Dr. Chitra Bakshi, a relationship counsellor says, “It’s really not an easy task to talk overtly about your sexual fantasies, not even with your partner. So couples often look out for chances, be it during the foreplay period or during sex. But the most appropriate time would be after sex, as your partner is likely to be in a sexually charged up state of mind to listen to you patiently. You can express those fancies that you would like them to try out, the next time you get intimate.”
Appreciating each other’s body : Remember that your partner loves being appreciated, not only for their sexual moves, but for their physical appearance and body as well. The most cherished after-sex moments are an apt opportunity to compliment your mate’s body. Telling your mate about the heavenly feeling you get while touching their body and also passing naughty remarks on their curves will surely pamper them.
Expert tip : Dr. Roy opines, “Since sex is all about physical touch, try and utilise these after-sex minutes to say good things about each other’s body. This would create a better comfort zone, bring about a feeling of reassurance to your mate that you like their body and it will make the art of undressing an easier task, as your partner will be more confident about their physical self.”
Exchanging expressions of love : You’d have said ‘I love you’ to your lover many a times but saying these words right after a sex quickie holds a special place. Verbal or physical gestures like hugging and cuddling, any expression of love can act as a catalyst if expressed at the right time. Once you’re done with a sexual session, whispering some sweet nothings into your partner’s ears can make them feel extra special.
Expert tip : Dr. Chitra confirms, “Exchanging expressions of love is a sure shot way to enjoy passionate moments with your partner. After enjoying sex, most partners fall asleep without even realising once that their mate might be longing for some loving gestures. So make the most of these special moments and indulge in a quick conversation and tell each other how much you love and care about them.”